HERE I GO, NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW!

I remember back to when I was graduating highschool. My entire senior year didn't feel any different. Sure, I got an hour for lunch where I could go off campus and enjoy McAllisters, or just hang out at Kevin's house. But, the reality that middle school/high school was about to truly be a thing of the past didn't really hit me until that night after graduation. It hit a little closer to home when I went off to college and actually moved into my dorm.

I remember being so scared when I first got to college. I really hated it at TFC for about the first two years. HA! I am not a big fan of EVERYTHING being new at once. The only time I have even remotely handled that well was this summer in the Philippines. And, even then, I had my fair share of ups and downs at first.

I am about to have my last first day of college EVER! It's a weird thought. I simply have one semester left. One measley semester that will be filled with classes like "photography" and "Cross-Cultural Story-telling". I only have four classes. TWo of them I didn't even have to have in order to graduate, but I had to take at least 12 hours to remain on-campus. To think, I could've only had 6 hours...but then, what would I have done with myself all semester?

This Christmas break has been needed in so many ways! I still don't feel caught up on sleep though. And, I am not going to lie: the last thing I want to do is go back to college. Don't get me wrong, I have amazing girls that I share a house with, and I am not sure what I would do with myself if I stayed home. There comes a point in all of my breaks where I start feeling like a complete bum and that I needed to do something more productive with my time!

I have finished most everything on my to-do list for Christmas break. I have applied to seminary, read four books (just for fun), hung out with friends, and even applied with the IMB for a consultant.

I feel like everything I have been working towards is becoming more real. When I walked down the aisle at church at the age of 15 and surrendered to full time ministry, I felt a little more concrete in what I was giving my life to. When I graduate highschool and moved to college and began my Cross-Cultural degree I began to feel even more like things were really coming together. However, when I stepped off of the plane in the Philippines this summer I really felt like,"THIS IS IT! This is my future. And I am not backing down". With college graduation just around the corner and my seminary applications in, I really feel like I'm growing up. God's calling on my life is ever-so-near in being fulfilled.

Yesterday I filled out a form online to get my own personal IMB consultant. This is someone who walks you through the process of becoming an IMB missionary. One might ask themselves, "Why do you have to have a consultant for such a thing?" In fact, four years ago I might have asked myself the same question! However, with missions in my nearer than distant future, I have come to realize being a career missionary with the IMB is nothing short of a mountain to climb! There are hoops you have to jump through, forms to fill out, years of preparation needed, etc... Don't get me wrong, because in my mind it is all completely worth it. But part of me stands at the top of one mountain wishing I could now begin what I am ever-so-eager to jump into!

With consultants and seminary coming into my life my future seems more real to me! I am seriously working my way to being a missionary. With this comes extreme excitement and a little hesitation. I know what I am called to do, and I won't back down. But naturally there is fear as I look over the steps ahead of me!

So, here I go...into my future. Things seem more real these days. I feel a little more grown up. With age comes reality, and sometimes it hits harder than you would like it to!